Are you struggling to stay motivated when taking on a new goal, behaviour, or habit?
Are you finding that you are starting over and over? From month to month?
Do you place an emphasis on guilt to boost your motivation? OR maybe shame yourself daily to get “back on track”?
It’s important to note that motivation is not a skill, nor is it a fixed personality trait we are born with or without.
Motivation fluctuates much like most things in life… it is not a default it's actually part and parcel of human nature.
Motivation is a sensation that comes and goes… so it may become difficult to rely on it when setting goals… BUT not all hope is lost… We can certainly keep our goals, behaviours & habits whilst we consider learning how to act in line with our best interests even when motivation is low or non-existent.
We can look to develop a capacity to achieve what we need to even if part of us doesn’t feel like it.
-Stay connected to the goal/behaviour/habit – even if you feel you have steered off track or experienced a setback – reconnecting with the goal can establish reflection on what occurred to cause the setback and learning from these will the goal/behaviour/habit fresh in your mind and provide the momentum required
** Taking a couple of minutes to journal daily is a great way to stay connected. List 1 – 2 things that you can do daily that will bring you closer to your goal/behaviour/habit you are wanting to employ.
-Keep it small – keeping goals smaller can build structure to larger longer-term goals whilst not feeling like a mammoth ordeal. When we recognise & reflect on the progress of small victories it can aid in keeping us energised to move towards the larger goals.
** Setting daily 2 -3 daily non-negotiables can be beneficial to implement the new behaviours which can ultimately lead to new habits. Once you can sustain the habits for optimal behaviours, then they will be able to sustain you.
-Reducing stress, shame & guilt – when taking on new goals, behaviours or habits we want to be aware of certain temptations – tapping into our body and recognising when we are feeling stress rise is important as we want to calm the mind & body, so we reduce the negative impact stress has on our choices for the future. We want to avoid the likelihood of a knee jerk reaction that may sabotage our efforts towards our goals, behaviours, or habits. IF you find you are experiencing a level of sleep deprivation, anxiety, a change in eating patterns, not in the right frame of mind we find our commitment to the goal reduced
** Recognise you are not in your best form cognitive wise, be gentle with yourself. Aim to focus on movement/exercise of any form, make time to get that in and prioritise sleep that night, it will help reduce those stress levels.
-Self- compassion and changing the inner dialogue of how you address yourself will be beneficial in reducing the guilt and shame you place on yourself if you experience a setback or roadblock on your journey.
Shame is not a helpful motivator, it can make us want to give up altogether, recoil & hide.
** If we focus on self-compassion, honesty & encouraging ourselves after a set back we will be more open & understanding of our goals which can lead to better outcomes.
If you are looking for some help in this area – feel free to reach out, hit reply and let me know your thoughts.
Stacey
Blog post is inspired by “Why has Nobody told me this before?” By Dr Julie Smith.
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